Quitting Is Not In My Vocabulary!!

Ugghh!!  That’s how I feel right now!  I’m no longer in the boarding house, and I am now living with one of my sisters.  Well my mom also moved in with her at the same time.  While at the boarding house I had a regime going concerning my diet and clean eating, and I was even meditating as I did my yoga.  I had lost almost 20lbs.!  Since I’ve been here, I’ve gained that 20lbs., and feels like I’m gained even more!!!  I want to scream!!!

One of the things I was doing that was working pretty well was drinking Apple Cider Vinegar and lemon juice.  Wasn’t the best tasting thing, but it’s not all horrible either.  But I would use two tablespoons of ACV with one tablespoon of lemon juice in 8oz. of water.  I would usually have it on ice.  Sometimes I would have it in the evening warm with some honey.

Bottom line is, I need to get this weight back OFF OF ME!!

I will say that October has started off nice.  My mom and I have decided to get back to clean eating.  She has diabetes so it’s just as important with me having CHF.  So no soda, no salt, and watch the starches!!  I do have to say that I have not been indulging in any sweets.  I’m really not a sweet eater.

I’ve also been doing pretty good with yoga.  I’ve challenged myself to accomplish two different poses.  I’ll share them down below.  I’ve also been trying to do some stretches that will help flexibility, which is key in doing yoga.  I didn’t think I would like it much, but I work up a good sweat !  Meditation is still also working good for me.  Helps with anxiety the most.  I’m still awaiting SSI and Disability, so the wait is extremely stressful!

Losing weight is hard with CHF, because of the fluid retention.  I’ve got numerous people on social media offering me the chance to do Herbalife and Beach Body, but at this moment I just can’t afford it.  I have to make do with what I’ve got.  What I’ve got is the opportunity to purchase clean foods and prepare them accordingly!  So let’s see with this October brings!!

Pose 1.  Almost completed!

Pose 2. Lol It’s a work in progress.


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How I’m Going To Get Back On Track With My Weight Loss

In February of this year I lost 15lbs.  I got on the scale this morning; I have gained almost 10 of those pounds back!  I’m livid, furious, and extremely discouraged!  But continuing to allow myself to feel these things is not going to make me feel any better.  So I’m stepping away, and I’m going to try to find some type of positive resolution to this situation.

First thing had to do was figure out my “Why?”.  What is the reason for my weight loss?  How is weight loss going to benefit me?  Well my “Why?” is because I have Congestive Heart Failure and Acute Obstructive Sleep Apnea.  My heart is struggling to function along with my Pacemaker, and all this added weight is not helping at all.  The Sleep Apnea is affecting how I breathe while sleeping.  Again, I need this weight off of me if I’m going to improve any of my health situations.   This reason alone ties along with my next “Why?”.  My two handsome boys!  They need me to be healthy and whole.  My mind needs to be right, my emotions need to be right, and so does my health.

The next thing I have done is evaluate my behaviors and eating patterns.  It’s funny but I started a Bujo (bullet journal) this month.  One of the sections in it is Health and Fitness.  Every day for the past two weeks I’ve been writing in it about what I’ve eaten and drank for the day.  One thing I noticed is that I don’t ever eat breakfast.  My first meal is always around 11am or close to 12pm.  I’m always eating something that I have to cook for someone else.  It’s not always something that I want to eat or should eat.  My water intake is good.  Every now and then I have a soda.  A lot of times I know I eat like this, because things are tight for me monetary wise.  I no longer get child support.  So I have no residual coming in. Another reason is just plain absence of willpower.

After that evaluation I made a grocery list.  Once I was finished with that, I scratched out all the items that I knew I shouldn’t be consuming. Then I started making recipes that I could do as Meal Preps.  I would like to start off doing breakfast and lunch.  It’s suggested to try not to do all of them at once.  Do one or two and make a habit out of it.  So I’m going to try and incorporate that on August 1st.  I’ll make sure I give you guys an update on that!

The next thing I did was made a space for my workout routines.  I started meditating a month ago, and for about the past week I’ve been doing Yoga.  I love doing both!  I didn’t realize how much sweat I would work up by doing Yoga, but I’m going to hang in with it.  Anyways, back on topic here nah!  I made a space for my Yoga Mat and my Rubber band that I’ve started using.  I created a nice workout routine and along with that a few Workout Playlists.

I believe my biggest downfall is understanding that not all things happen overnight.  They say it takes four weeks for you to notice any type of change in your body.  I have to weigh everyday because of the Heart Failure to make sure I am not taking on any excess fluid(not a good thing).  So it’s hard to do that and NOT think of weight loss.  I have a Vision Board that I’ve just made that includes inspirational themes on weight loss.  I love looking at it, and it gives me that extra push.  No it’s not pictures of half naked women with no weight whatsoever!  It’s more words and statements.

I’ve got to get this weight back off of me!  I know I can do it, because I’ve done it before.  I just need to have faith and some patience to see it through!  Have any suggestions?  Have a witness to what  has worked for you?  Leave it in the comments for me!


Remember to Stay POSITIVE, Stay MOTIVATED, and Be BLESSED!


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Update: What’s Been Up With My 30-Day Challuunge

On July 7th of this year I started a 30-Day Challunge!!!!  It consists of 200 squats, 200 calf lifts, and 200 push ups.  I didn’t do the push ups, because I was scared the movements were going to mess with my pacemaker.  So I did just the calf lifts and the squats.  Well last week, well the end of the week before last, I had to stop doing the squats.  My left knee cap is shifted, and it started to hurt.  I’m too broke to go to another doctor!  lol

I’m still doing my meditations.  It has been really helping me with clearing my mind and getting to sleep.  Where as I was going to sleep for an hour or so and then waking up and being up for hours, I am now sleeping all the way through til morning.  I’ve got at least four different playlists created.  Some jazz, some rain sounds, and a little Zen.  I think the Zen is my most favorite!

I also started YOGAAAA!!!  I’m in love with it!  I’m on the app Holonis, and I’ve come to know a lot of people pretty well.  I have a friend who calls himself The Bearded Wanderer.  He’s the one who actually suggested it to me.  Then one day he posted a pic of him after a session, and I said “why not?”  So I was on Pinterest and looked up a couple of pins, well a lot of pins, and created my own little workout.  They’re all “on feet” positions, because lawd if I get on that floor, there is no one to help me get up.  No, I do not have Life Alert!  lol I do one floor position only…. The Moo Cow.  Stop laughing y’all!

My youngest son bought me a band from Five Below .   It’s a fairly regular size one.  It has some really good handles on it, and there’s this do dad that let’s you hook it in the door and work your shoulders.  So I have been working my biceps, triceps, and a little of my shoulders.  Loving this as well.  It doesn’t tire me out much, and most of the exercises I can sit and do to keep from getting lightheaded.

I have not been dancing though.  Dyspnea was really hitting me hard when I would do this.  I started off doing almost five songs a day.  But I began to feel real lightheaded.  So to play it safe I stopped doing them for a bit.  I wish besides walking that I could get some other type of cardio in!  This is beginning to become a frustration for me.  Nevertheless, I won’t give up.  The show must go on!

I have not looked at the scale much, only to keep an eye on my fluid intake.  On July 31st I’m going to measure my biceps, my calves, my stomach, and my abdomen to see if there are any changes.  I’ve continued to make sure that I’m eating clean and healthy.  I’m trying to decide whether I want to try doing a couple of weeks of just vegetables.  Anybody do just vegetables leave me a comment and let me know how it’s been working for you!



My 30-Day Challuuunge!!

So in my flight of Ascension, one of the things I’ve decided to do is transform my body as well.  Whatever I can do to improve my health physically is definitely on my agenda.  Due to Dyspnea cardio is not on the table right now, apart from getting in 3,000 steps!  But why not work on other parts of the body that I can without sending my heart into a race?  So as I strolled through Twitter I came across this trainer who was asking people to join his 30-day challenge.  

This challenge was supposed to be 200 push ups, 200 calf lifts, and 200 squats.  I can’t do the push ups, because I am afraid it will affect my pacemaker.  It moves around enough as it is, and I don’t want to risk pulling the lead out!  However, I can do the calf lifts and squats with no problem!  So on June 27, 2018, I started this challenge!  But I’m so pissed though, that no one else is doing it, and the guy who introduced it hasn’t said much about it either!  So I’m making this challenge my OWN!!   I will  be doing 200 calf lifts and  200 squats everyday for a week with a  1 days rest between weeks for 30 days.

This challenge will or should reflect loss in inches not necessarily pounds.  I’ve read recently that when doing any kind of workout there may be an increase in pounds for a bit before there is any loss.  So I’m not going to be weighing in this month for weight loss; just for the CHF.  I have to stay aware of fluid that I may be retaining.  

6/27/18, I measured parts of my body that I think will be affected by the calf lifts and squats.  The measurements are as follows:

  • Lower Abdomen          57.5 in
  • Stomach                           52.0 in
  • Left arm                            15.0 in
  • Right arm                          15.0 in
  • Calves                                 15.5 in/ 16 in
  • Thighs                                 21 in/ 21.5 in
  • Neck                                    17 in
  • Weight                                264 lbs.

So the first day I did all 200 of each exercise, and OMG I was hurting like crazy the next day!  My body was extremely sore!  I had to modify the squats.  I couldn’t go down all the way at all.  On the third day I was feeling ok.  My body had gotten used to the movements .  I had to make sure I kept my back straight with the squats.  Squats really challenge your core, I can tell you that!  I also had to remind myself to stretch before doing these moves, because you better believe I caught a cramp or two in my legs from those calf lifts.

So in this next 7 days I’m going to attempt to bring my squats down just a little bit lower!  I think I can, I think I can!  I do increments of 50, but I do both together.  So I do the 50 calf lifts and right after I do 50 squats.  I then stretch this out throughout the day, because I can NOT do them all at one time.  I’m just keeping it real!  Today I measured and the results are as follows:

  • Lower Abdomen          58.0 in
  • Stomach                           53.0 in
  • Left arm                            15.0 in
  • Right arm                          15.0 in
  • Right calf                          16.5 in
  • Right thigh                       22.5 in
  • Neck                                   17 in
  • Weight                               264 lbs

So I’m having mixed feelings about these measurements.  I really didn’t expect my stomach and abdomen to increase, but this could be due to CHF.  When I retain fluid from blood that can’t be processed by my heart, it goes straight to my belly.  This is depressing, but it’s become my reality for right now.  I did see an increase in the calf and thighs, but I believe that is to be expected.  I’ll take pictures later.  Maybe it will be easier to see both of these areas become defined through images instead!  I’m going to do the Sumo squat this week.  I think it’ll be easier to go lower with this technique.

Stay tune for progress reports!  If you guys have any input please leave it in the comments!  Any help is appreciated and welcomed!


Remember to Stay POSITIVE, Stay MOTIVATED, and Be BLESSED!


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Stepping Into The Flow Of Weightloss

Just the sight of the word makes me tired!  Ha!  Hi I’m Valerie and welcome to the Fit Journey section of ValerieAscending!  Ever since I’ve encountered Congestive Hear Failure it has been really hard for me to do any exercise.  On top of having CHF, I have Acute Obstructive Sleep Apnea and Dyspnea.  The Sleep Apnea alone makes it hard for me to get up in the morning.  I often incur really bad migraines as well.  Dyspnea is simply having a lack of oxygen.  To me it’s a feeling of my body locking up on me.  My body locks up and it’s very hard to breathe.  Most people overlook shortness of breath, but it can be symptoms of a bigger problem such as, heart and lung disease.


One of the things my doctors told me to assist my heart into getting stronger was to lose weight.  I was offered the chance to get a Gastric Sleeve, but I had already been under the knife twice and was very weary of going through surgery again at that moment.  Besides, I’ve seen the aftermath of those types of surgeries, especially if the weight loss is quick and drastic.  I’m not discrediting these surgeries, I’m just saying they are not for me at this time.  I had to find an alternative to lose weight.  In my current financial state, I am being forced to get creative with this weight loss of mine.  The first suggestion was to try walking.  “Okay”, I said.  But for me it was easier said than done!

I got someone to help me start Weight Watchers.  I joined in February of 2018.  My first month I lost 13lbs.!!!  I was soo overjoyed.  But March didn’t yield any more weightloss.  I didn’t gain anything, but I didn’t lose anything either.  April was my last month, because I just simply couldn’t afford it any longer.  But I was able to take a lot away from Weight Watchers.  I was able to teach myself smarter ways to eat, and be more diligent with “what” I was eating. 

Walking was not going to be “it” for me.  The Dyspnea was just making it too hard.  I had installed a Fit app on my phone.  One of the activities on it was “Steps”.  Hell, if I can’t walk at least I could try keeping track of my steps, right?  So that’s what I began to do!

In April I downloaded the Fit app for Android.  I started out with a step goal of 1500.  Yes it’s a small goal, but at first it was hard for me to just meet that goal!  I was like , “damn, how am I going to meet big goals, and I can’t meet this little goal?”  So what I did is, whenever I would go to the store, I would park a little ways from the entrance and just take my time walking to the store.  If I parked close to the entrance I would walk the perimeter of the store before getting my items, and then I would walk the perimeter before I would check out.  Often I would talk to my friends or my family while in the store, because it would deter my mind from focusing on how tired I may have been getting.

June 1st I changed my goal to 3,000 after I consistently hit my goal of 1500 for over a week.  Actually, I was hitting 3,000 on a few of those days.  So after being consistent for a week, I upped my goal to 3,000!!!  In April I walked a total of 22,111 steps.  In May I walked a total of 62,503 steps!  It’s June 19th and I’ve already put in 60,100 steps!!!  I’m so extremely proud of myself.  But sometimes all it takes is putting that first step forward and making it count!!

But I’m still not seeing what I want to see when I step on the scale!  Another challenge of mine is FLUID!!  Because of the Congestive Heart Failure, one of the things I battle with the most is the build up of fluid.  I have to weigh myself everyday.  In the event of an increase of 5lbs. in one day I have to notify my doctor.  Often I have to increase my fluid pills.  Right now I’m currently on two different diuretics.  Even these alone can’t guarantee that I will not retain fluid.  So I have to constantly watch my sodium intake.  The other thing I knew I needed to do, was to give my body just a little shock.  Sometimes doing the things that the body is already accustomed to doing will not result in weight loss.  It may keep you fit, but there may not be a significant amount of loss.

Yes!  I have decided to dance!  You know before I had my first heart attack I lost almost 40lbs.  One of the things I was doing besides eating healthy was dancing.  I had a Wii, and my favorite game was Just Dance.  But I don’t have my Wii anymore, BUT of course you can find anything and everything on YouTube!!!  I was able to create a playlist on YouTube with all my favorite Just Dance songs.  I just started this last week so I don’t have much to report on concerning pounds I’ve lost.  I can say this; my bra is very loose!!  Whenever I lose weight it’s always in the boobs!!!   Sheesh!  Can it be my belly instead please?!!!  

Another thing I’ve learned through research is that instead of hopping on the scale, I should start measuring areas of my body instead.  So last week before I started dancing I measured my lower abdomen, and my midsection.  My abdomen was 59 inches, and my midsection was 57 inches.  I dance five songs, and I danced four days last week.  My minimum is three songs three days of the week.  I’ll measure again on June 30th, and I’ll be sure to give you guys updates!!

Remember I am not and do not claim to be a Fitness Expert!  These are things I have been told by my doctor and research I’ve done on the internet.  Please seek a professional for your specific needs, and be safe with whatever method you seek in losing weight!


Remember to Stay POSITIVE, Stay MOTIVATED, and Be  BLESSED!!